things change ; And so will i

i may be a little behind, but the experience starts now. as i sink in the juices of this life and its fumes of diversity illuminate my senses.........life is grand!

cruising

*turns to face me*

"would you be my girlfriend?"

".......What?"

"Nvm..."

"no, sayyy...."

"i said, would you be my girlfriend?"

*smiles*... "but i didn't even said i love you yet"

"i know..."

.......................*keeps quiet*...................

"i want to tell you something" *pulls you close and whispers in your ear*

...."i love you"

oblivion, content, fireworks, chocolate cakes, vanilla icecreams and brownies, overlooking a view of the sunset, heart aching, chest burdening,hearing the waves of the sea, contempt, love, life.....

is what we both felt on the 21st of february 2009. at around 9 something at night; watching the punisher at ,then, cineleisure..

at that moment, never did i expect for things to end up like this. its not and ending.
to be honest,i thought we were gonna end up being broken to pieces because of boredom.

but i keep forgetting, i've always adored you. ever since i saw you through the webcam. in your room at the condominium, at the hallway, you wearing your sleevless gym outfit, coming up to the laptop,slowly caressing my cheeks on the screen.. how i adored you, despite the fact i tried so hard to push you away.

i keep wondering why good things in this life never seems to last.
and i keep reminding myself, your gonna be there at the finishing line.
and i can't wait to see you sayang.
grown up,and in my arms.

i've taken you, all of you,as who you are. the bad the good the annoying... and i still loved you.
i still love you. with all of my heart.
i need to be independent now.

you've been carrying me.
while you walk through this life.
its time you put me down.
so that i could learn to walk with you by my side instead.

God, give me the strength, to go through this life,through the challenges and the lessons for me to learn. Show me the path that i should take, and guide me in choosing the right choices. Aminn..

justice

God, really is fair. He is perfect.so perfect in all his activities. in every good feeling on each negative activity that we do, it gives bad impact. and in every bad feeling on each good activity is a positive one. everything including our activities had 2 sides . He's so perfect in his plans. and as much as we try to plan. as much as we try to divert. to follow according to our needs and wants; He has the last say. the last say..

im single.

im finally that now. it sank slowly into the depths of my mind,my soul when i was talking to you last night. Last night, i cried tears of joy, realising that you are changing without me asking you too. I cried because i finally understand this is the solution and not the problem. I cried because given the circumstances,the status, My feelings for you shines even brighter from within me. And your name. is carved on my heart.

This relationship has taught me so many things. And i know i need time to grow as well. we both do. and like i've said before. i'm gonna say it again. that i can't wait to see you grow into the man i see you could be.. and now whenever i think of you. or hear your name. your voice. i feel like my feelings are rooting deeper and deeper each day. we don't know what our future holds. but if its possible,i want you to be there, in mine. i dont want to lose this. i want to see you later in my life as mine,again. i'll pray for that every single day. :)

I love you very much zunaidi alias.

.

It is not Islam that is imperfect. not Islam that is aggressive. But the muslims. As we are all but human beings. all of us. just different colours, different race. God made us different for us two know each other. to learn to cooperate amongst each other.