happy birthday to youu

16....17....18...

days,ages,years.

These numbers are running faster than ever.

I didn't feel a gush of wind. nor the earth shake. nor lightning striking. nor the movement of the orbits around me.

I wave to the days and nights that passes me by. This year was even faster for some reason.

Sands of time is running out faster on me, on us.

I can barely feel the moment passing me by. every moment is so precious to me now.

And now, even birthdays dont mean much anymore.

I pray and hope.

Make me feel like 18 is worth it. i want to spend the next 12 months doing something

meaningful.living life by the moment and not just observing it this time.

i want to feel.... alive. living this world that is so wonderful. so many things to see, to discover.
to love.

let me appreciate every taste, feel,sight and sound of everything combined.

let me love what and who is loving me with equal amount of compassion.

give me the strength to realise the thing that i have taken advantage on.

i will appreciate and love with my whole heart.

Give me the strength of sincerity.

Amin.

the warmth of your gaze

the palm of your wave- bibio

There is no denying how much i love you
I dont have to create the same path, the same fate as previous relationships had been.
But i admit every relationship was different in its own way.
Each teaching me different things. different life lessons.
But i am still in the process of learning.

learning you and learning life with you by my side.
Yes,God holds our fate. but we can change things for the better.
And as i promised, i'd hold on as long as i can. as long as it takes.
our relationship is different. something i need to remind myself again.

And again,you surprise me. we surprise each other at what the thought of the end could do for us. There is a change and it is a change i will cherish and thank God for. For i am hopelessly falling in love with you.all over again. It feels so magical and yet it feels familliar. but better. And i love it so much. Everything you do. i can feel; your gaze, a simple touch of the hand, or a kiss on the forhead. it means something true. defining a meaning that punctures deeper to my soul.

and i love you. i love you so much for realising, for making me love you even more. for making every moment together even more precious as before. maybe this was needed to realise both of us.

Life is an adventure. with so many ups and downs. And i will share this with you beside me.

I love you.

tested faith

It's a sacrifice you thought needed.It's a jumpstart to where things started.It's the feel in your stomach when we smile to each other.It's the rush in your veins when we kiss and cuddle.The chemical x that is running out is just simply being refilled.To let go is something i don't want taken as option.I know just how much you value.. and you value so high to me. sometimes i feel selfish. i know you don't want this.but i would rather have this than lose you to my slowly dying feelings. and i know how i am.and some things don't change as much as i want them to. even when you mean so much to me. you mean so much to me sayang.i don't mean to hurt you so much. i know all i've been doing lately is that. but you know me and you know me well. It's been awhile since i've been flying. and i promise if i can't fly properly i will come back. i dont want to jeopardise what i already have.i promise i will come back. I love you so much Zunaidi Alias.

the beauty of imagination

i close my eyes,
i feel the wind breeze,
softly sculpting my face,
as it dances through my hair,
i smell the salty scent of the ocean waves
as it crashes to the sea,potraying constant rebel,
i grasp the sand and feel its coarseness between my sensitive fingers,
acknowledging its texture
lying on a hammock,
withnessed by the great blue sky,
and warmth of the sun rays that melted away all my problems and insecurities
i felt sane
.....
...
..
.
i open my eyes
im in my dorm
surrounded by walls, doors
dormmates,books,
exams,
strangers.

i need a holiday.

god!

im starting to get why my boyfriend rarely updates his blog.

sorry people, but not only do i not hve time but i also dont have free access to my stuffs.:/

so yeahh..anyway. finals looks pretty near right about now.and i gotta make sure i settle all notes,assignments,tasks and reports before my revision period. WHICH SO HAPPENS TO BE DURING RAYAA FYI PEOPLE! SHOOTT MEEEE!!!

Inhale

I feel my breathe taken away from me.

i feel it when you put your lips gently to mine.

when you look into my eyes and you tell me you love me,

when you say everythings going to be okay. and i am assured that it will be.

I feel like i always leave something in that car when i walk away.

Like my heart.

And your eyes becomes filled with tears.

And you search into mine which becomes untimely hollow.

And our heart feels twisted, and my soul feels incomplete.

And i love you. I love you so very much.

Too much that it hurts me to leave your side.

That i tear at this very moment. desperately trying to take control of my rigid self.

Maybe you know or maybe you don't.

Of the effects that you do to me.

And that your name has somehow been carved on my heart.

whtttt

Must it always be this complicated.
Suddenly now this life we're living feels so fake.so full of lies made up from observations of previous lies before. It proves so much that men judge the things they don't know.
The more i learn, the more i become.. afraid. But im beginning to think of the dilemma thats hidden within my thoughts. It takes so much commitment but i can't bear to come out from this comfort zone i have been in fr a long time.this thought may come through me from time to time. in the mean time, im gonna study as hard as possible. im gonna be here for only a year anyway.


loves;